Italy Wins World Cup

It's finally over; Italy's won. Who cares, you may be asking? I thought the Conservababes were true, red-blooded Americans who only cared about real sports like hockey, football, basketball and baseball. This is entirely true.

However, we do care. In the first place, we won't have to see any more annoying World Cup highlights on ESPN, taking away valuable air time from above mentioned real sports. Secondly, France lost.

France lost. I cannot deny that gives me small comfort. And they didn't just lose, they lost in the most embarrassing manner --after their captain decided to head butt one of the Italian players in overtime and was tossed from the game. Of course, that still didn't stop them from giving him the best player award. (Ahh, how those western Euros love to appease...)

France is obnoxious enough when they're defeated (as they've much experience with), can you imagine if they'd won? What the rest of the world would have to endure? And can we please focus on baseball again?